Monday, May 27, 2013

Let the Guy be the Guy

I've finally started caving into advice my dad always tells me, "Stop being so stubborn and just let the guy be the guy."  I hate this advice.  I was raised "not to need anyone to support you financially" or "to support yourself" or "be strong and independent." But then I also get the advice "just let the guy be the guy" or "let him pay/take out the trash/insert male activity here that single girls do for themselves."

So ... What do you expect someone to do for you, and what do you just do for yourself?  I have two pretty great guys in my family, my dad and brother.  I remember when I was going through everything with my foot injury a few weeks ago, icing it, and eating anti-inflammatories like they were candies.  I was sick one night, and ended up staying with my dad and brother.  After a full day of work, a doctors visit, a trip to the pharmacy to get my prescriptions, and a reluctant trip to a "goodbye" happy hour, I got home to my dads house only to realize he had no unexpired pain killers in the entire house.  I was so exhausted and I just took a big sigh and collapsed in defeat onto the floor.  Five seconds later my brother was in the doorway in pajamas shoes and a jacket with keys in hand.  "What kind of pain killers do you need?  It's a five minute trip to the drug store."  It was Tuesday on a work night at 11:00 PM.

Last weekend I went to a baseball game with the guy I've seen recently a few times, and I noticed that he always opens the door for me.  Car door or building door.  I told one of my friends that he's done this and she said "Wow it's sad that this is something that is impressive now."  I feel like its not that common anymore to find people who have this built in "take care of you" attitude.

I feel like now that I'm separating myself from my most recent exboyfriend (of four years) and reconnecting with my college boyfriend (of two years), I'm getting a lot more clarity about why those relationships didn't work.  I'm not sure I'm in a place to jump into something, but I feel like I'm getting good at recognizing things that I like and knowing I don't have to deal with things that won't make me happy.  And that it's totally fine to move on from someone who I don't think will make me happy.


106 Miles Down 144 Miles To Go

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